Hey everybody! A few days ago I was feeling massively emotional. Like you know when you know you’re acting crazy, but you just cant stop…anyone else ever have this? I’m pretty sure that both of my neighbors know when I’m feeling like this. Cause I might be loud.
Its fine.
Anyways. A few days ago I was feeling crazy, and I’ve learned a little thing about myself. I get like this when I’m frustrated with me. I’m the problem. I want to pretend that its everyone else causing me angst but really its just this girl, not doing her stuff. I know some of you are thinking “you just had a baby, cut yourself some slack!” but this runs a little deeper. Its not just taking it easy, its not doing anything that I should be, or want to be, doing because I’ve watched complete seasons of Mad Men, Better Call Saul, and House since I birthed the little Bremlin. So approximately 1/2 of his life in solid tv. Dude. That’s embarrassing.
My frustration with my lack of well, everything, hit a fever pitch. I was talking to Court and everything just seemed like such a big deal, even though it wasn’t. The conversation started when I went in to tell him about this awesome idea for a room makeover and he said “You should talk to someone else about this because I don’t get it.” What he meant was “I’m not a visionary and I don’t see what you see. You can tell me about it but I probably wont have anything to add to the conversation.” and I took it as “I hate you. Stop talking to me.” At which point I lost the little bits of tape that were holding me together and had to have a 2 hour conversation with him about why I need someone to talk to about my ideas and how much I need creative people in my life. News flash, as creative as he is, Don Draper is not that person for me.
Then (after I calmed down) I got thinking about all of you, and your projects, and your creative tribes and it just made me so happy. Seriously, still a little emotional here.
So I thought it would be so fun to have a hand in a little project between friends. Picture you and a few friends chatting and having an all around great time, and then a stranger walks up and group hugs everyone and starts crying. That’s me, I love a good group hug.
I’m giving away 3 world famous brass geometric Himmeli wreath kits from the Vintage Revivals Shop to 1 lucky person, just so that you and your creative besties can get together and have a fun night on me.
Pop over to Instagram to enter!
I promise I wont be crazy and show up at your door…or will I?
.
I totally understand where you’re coming from! I’ve been able to save myself from a lot of anger and headaches by responding rather than reacting. Taking that few extra seconds for yourself can be helpful.
I have felt like this too. Especially when I’m all excited telling my husband about a project for our house and then he shoots it down (we have very different taste). At times I have felt “alone in my quest” because my husband and most my family have very different design taste than me and it’s hard to bounce ideas off of them. PS you’re awesome and I love your blog?
Sooo … I’ve been following your blog for 2+ years and I don’t think I’ve ever commented before. But as someone who doesn’t even have the whole “just pushed a human being out of me” excuse to fall back on for being emotional af, this post really meant a lot to me. It helped me put myself into perspective and kind of laugh at how utterly ridiculous I am because what you did to Court? Yep. Done did that to my love this past week because WHY DO YOU HATE ME? when really he is just the emotional chill other half of myself who has to counterbalance my craycray.
ANYWAY. Nothing to do with the giveaway (which is awesome) just needed to share and let you know how much I took this post to heart and how much it meant to me, especially time-wise.
Thanks Mandi for being a slice o’ sunshine in the blogging world.
LOVE YOUR GUTS.
So I’m not going to enter because I live in Australia but listen girl, you aren’t alone here. And it’s probs got more to do with postpartum than you give credit for. I had my second 5 months ago and was feeling pretty good until just recently when I turned into a hormonal stess ball. Anxiety, tears, the works. I know it will pass (it did with my first) but the hormonal shift is real.
Also, newborns + binge tv is the way to go. Yaaaassss queen.
Mandi!! I feel like this always. It’s like everything is going against me. And if you’re talking crazy strangers, I’m moving to St. George in a few months and one of my first thoughts was “OMG, Mandi Gubler lives there and maybe I will run into her!” and if I do, I’m going to give you a crazy person hug, because you are such an inspiration to me and probably thousands of other people!
I feel exactly the same; I have no creative counterpart, no muse. I get frustrated with my husband when he doesn’t get passionate about some DIY vision I’ve had and I take it personally. I wish I had a bestie to get creative with but until that happens I’m going to keep on stalking you. 🙂
Girl, I know that feeling! You are so not alone. I don’t have many in-real-life friends who “get” the whole blogging/DIY/creativity thing, so I feel very isolated sometimes! It’s so nice to know we have this little community of wonderful people online who totally understand!
Aww Mandi, here is the internet at its best: building connection and making the world a little smaller. THANK YOU for being so real, always! I too have been following you for almost 2 years, check your blog daily, and smile every time I see a new post. You do that for me, a total stranger, and I have such respect and appreciation for you. I’m not a mom, and I know that is a whole other layer of complexity, but the secret to my sanity is get myself outside, no matter how blue/crazy I feel. If I isolate and spend too much time looking at a screen, it ALWAYS makes things worse. Maybe you’re already doing this, but the Mandi of my imagination is outside with her kids in the Utah sunshine on the regular. I just checked the weather forecast for where you are, and dang! Heck of a lot nicer than where I am (Orcas Island, WA). Get out there in that 70-degree sunshine and let me live vicariously through you a little more. : )
So much love to you!
OOOh Mandi! I hug you! I’m far from you (Sherbrooke,Quebec,Canada), but when I read you it is like I’m in the same room.
Thank you for all you done. You give me so much by your blog.
Hugs, babe.
Thanks. You express really well the exact same way I have been feeling for quite a few months. I’m sorry for what you’ve been going through. You’re not going through it by yourself.
I have been reading your blog for a couple years, but I don’t know if I’ve ever commented.
I love how real and down to earth you are. Thank you for your honesty.
We all get in a funk. For some strange reason I seem to get it every February. There is no significance to that month. And even if I know it always happens, it seems to sneak up on me every damn year! When I lived in London I used to blame it on the long long winter. But now I’m back in my hometown in New Zealand, and it’s beautifully warm summer here, so I dunno.
Forgive yourself for taking downtime. We all need to zone out and de-tune every once in a while.
And as my hubby always says, there’s no problem a group hug can’t fix!
Love your guts
Dude, come on over… I will be ready to catch your crazy ass in a huge group hug!!! because…I have already been your crazy ass, so I am pretty sure I am qualified . Take heart in the fact that all of the mama drama emotional-ism starts to die down a bit by the time your oldest is 30…ish. Love YOUR guts!
Oh gosh, PLEASE show up at our door! I live in Israel though, so you might also consider staying for a slumber party… You really hit a nerve here. I gave birth 2 month ago and my blog has suffered terribly. And it’s making me sad and restless. I wanted to use this time to create, to turn my blog into a more substantial part of my professional life. Instead, I’ve been eating chocolate and watching design reality shows. Goddamit. Knowing that you- my favourite DIY blogger- is also going a little mad- makes me kinda happy and encouraged 🙂 I’m sending virtual hugs and happy, productive and creative thoughts!