Happy Friday you guys! So its 2:22 am (make a wish!) Court is camping and I have the worst time sleeping when he’s not here. Not to mention I was really thirsty and decided to drink some Bai instead of water. Caffeine? Suuuuuure, why not, I’ll be awake anyways…So um how’s your day going?
Life has been pretty hectic around here lately, there is so much that I want to share, hopefully next week I’ll be able to start chatting and then you wont be able to get me to stop ;). In the meantime, lets have a heart to heart, yes? I’m not sure if you’ve noticed but the last year or so I’ve been a little (and at times, a lot) off. If you’re a long time reader you might have noticed, and if you’re newish then you don’t know anything different. But this is me openly talking about it which can be sort of scary on the internet. So please be patient with me as I fumble over my fingers and write run on sentences.
I’m an open person, its who I am. In accepting my faults and trying to become better, not perfect, I’ve learned how to genuinely love everyone for who they are and where they are with no strings attached. I think that being so involved in 12 Step work helped me become that way. Its easy to see that while people are in bad situations that they aren’t bad. On the flip side, as I’ve learned, being so open can leave you vulnerable, like a turtle without a shell. Fleshy. (Sorry if you hate that word!)
Last year I had some really close friends choose to, I don’t know what the word is…leave? Can people leave friendships like they leave relationships? I internalized it and though it was very much out of my control, I took all of the emotional responsibility for their immature and irresponsible behavior.
In so doing, it fundamentally effected the way that I saw myself. Have you ever been in a situation like that?
I would work through it and think that I was in the clear, and then the anger and frustration and rejection would resurface, throwing me back onto the ground face first. At the same time, I was pregnant with the boy wonder and had hormones (I’m sure) making things harder than they probably would have been otherwise. For months I analyzed and reanalyzed what had happened trying to make sense of it. Knowing in my head that I’m not responsible for other peoples choices, but feeling so much hurt in my heart.
I’m so grateful for this experience though, because it has made me take a much deeper look at myself. Over the last year, I became more closed off and fearful of what people thought of me. I worried about things that were out of my control and I feel like I lost the welcoming aura that could make anyone around me comfortable. Probably because I was so wrapped up in my own thoughts. And I was frustrated. SO frustrated. Because this is not who I wanted to be. I felt like (and voiced a few times here) that I was failing. I was stuck in this downward cycle of failing and apologizing and feeling guilty for sucking and then failing more.
So do you want to know what woke me up? For years Court has been telling me that I just need to change what I was doing and put out easy content that I could just make money on. Stuff like affiliate round ups or taking an image off of pinterest and linking to things to recreate the space. For years I’ve told him to suck an egg but the more depressed and less invested that I was feeling, the more his argument seemed like a good idea. I didn’t have to put my heart into a round up. Until last week, when I had to make the hardest decision that I’ve made in a year. It came down to choosing a direction. What was Vintage Revivals going to be from this point forward? While we were talking about it, I said I didn’t really want to go in this other direction, and he said “Why, you’re not doing anything anyways?” My answer, for some reason that I’ll be eternally grateful for, relit my fire.
I told him it was because I make stuff. I make things that don’t exist anywhere. I create beautiful spaces out of nothing. That anyone can spend $50k on a bathroom makeover but it takes creative grit to do it yourself and have it look like a million bucks. And the most important part is that instead of telling someone to buy a $3000 chandelier I teach incredible women to take matters into their own hands and do it themselves! I think that I’ve always had this whispering in the back of my mind that kept inching its way forward until it became a full blown negative thought. That somehow I was less of a designer because I wanted to make things instead of buy them. It made me inferior. When that thought was fully formed in the heat of this moment I was able to look at it for what it was, a BIG STUPID LIE. Do you know how awesome it is that we can dream up a wall treatment and be able to execute it with our own 2 hands?! Do you know how great it is that we don’t have to be limited by what can be bought in a store or exists at face value?! As DIYers we can do whatever the crap we want. RAHHHHHHHH!
DIY saved me. It literally changed the course of my entire life. It gave me something that in the turmoil of Court’s addiction I could actually make better. Over the last 6 years it has brought me more joy and fulfillment than I can even describe. It has made me who I am. It has created this community in this little corner of the internet for which I will be eternally grateful.
As a blogger in this space its easy to get caught up in what everyone else is doing. What the next big thing is, who the next big thing is, and how you’re not it and probably doing things all wrong. That is where its easy to start to drift.
If you hear nothing else from this post hear this: I’ve relearned something that I forgot. This blog isn’t about me, its about you. It doesn’t matter what all the other bloggers are doing, it matters what YOU, my people, are doing and how I can teach, encourage, and inspire you to do it better. So what are you doing? Where can I help?
You know when you want to say that you were doing the best that you could, but in reality you weren’t really doing anything to change the situation? That was me. I feel like I was living on autopilot. Especially here. I’m a communicator, and the way I process things is to talk about it. So I would like very much to apologize to each of you for being so wrapped up in myself that I failed to see you as more than a number or a comment or a like, for not delivering projects and tutorials that I said I would share, and for expecting you to be invested in what I had to say here when I wasn’t all in. I was wrong and I am very sorry (this is the part where we *hopefully* group hug).
If you’ve made it to the end of this post, thank you. If you’re feeling something, share it below. If you have suggestions I would love to hear them! Thank you for supporting me and being patient with the crazy, it truly truly means the world!
xo
m
Hi fellow insomniac!
“broken” friendships are something I don’t think people talk about enough– especially the weird mysterious ones that leave you examining your every move for ages. There perhaps isn’t much to be said about the situation, but it is truly one of the most gut wrenching feelings. It’s happened to me twice in my life and it’s been worse than any traditional boyfriend relationship break up. Even after all these years I think, “what did I do wrong? where did we part ways? and why was I oblivious to it until the bitter end?” I’m happy to hear you’re finding positive in this situation and using it as a point of helping you to move forward. I hope you’re past the worst of it.
Additionally, your blog is one of very, very few who post incredible, radical and awe-inspiring original content without the ads, and the associate links and the short round up posts and blah blah blah. THANK YOU for sticking up for your vision. I’m still new to the DIY game but your work has been more than inspiring. What beautiful things you do, to create work that is stunning and utilitarian with your own two hands. Feminist indeed. Keep doing what you’re doing, we’re here to support your journey through its ups and downs! I’m so happy your spark is “re-lit” so-to-speak, but please also remember that you work in a completely new and non-traditional platform where your work is extremely personal and susceptible to flux as it reflects your real life and real projects.
You are just an absolute rockstar, such an inspiration. Thanks for the honesty and your post. I’m looking forward to all of the amazing things you’re going to offer this little world of ours!
All the best from a reader in Wisconsin!
-Carm
Mandi, you are amazing. I’ve read your blog for years and you HAVE influenced my style so much! Though we’ve never met, and I’m not sure I’ve ever commented before, I think to myself at least once a week, “oh, that’s so VR!” I even have an (in progress) corner of my house that is inspired by you. As for making decisions, I’m the worst (hence the in progress theme throughout my life). Thank you for this post, but know that I don’t think any apology is needed! You reminded me that making a decision to follow your heart is so much more brave than no decision at all. Just keep being you!
Hello,
I am a french reader so, please, excuse my english … DO NOT APOLOGIZE !! Since i have discovered your blog, it has ALWAYS been a true pleasure to visit it. Obviously, you are one of my strongest drug so, indeed, I always hope to read something new when I wait for my computer to upload your blog. However, you do not owe me anything and I am gratefull with what you share already, so please do not be so hard on yourself 🙂
Thank you.
“I teach incredible women to take matters into their own hands and do it themselves.”
Yes. You really do, Mandi.
Watching you with power tools has sparked confidence in me as a homeowner to learn how stuff works and be the handy-woman in our home. I feel so proud when people see our tool bench in the basement and I get to tell them I’m the queen of the tools in this family. Thank you for showing me that possibility.
ALSO we follow you because we love you. Even if you’re having a rough season. We understand. Smile and drive on, sister. ??
You helped me by writing this post and I love you even more for it. I also think you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself, especially for the periods of your pregnancy and after. You had way more important things to do.
I struggle with so many things and the blog has given me (like you said) the only place where I can control things. Where I can change something if I don’t like it. Where I can create and make things which fulfills me and has saved me too. So many things in my life are out of my control. I have been in family counseling due to extended family issues that I feel like are dragging me down continuously and gave me crippling anxiety and that mixed in with the constant comparison to other blogs and what they are doing and if you are good enough is toxic.
I have always loved that you continue to march to the own beat of your drum and there is no need to apologize if you feel like you stopped for a little while 😉 We all work through things.
Your blog truly offers something different than any blog out there and I’m so glad you put the thoughts behind it into words in this post! I love seeing the DIYs you post because I know they will always be creative, original and affordable for anyone to recreate — the best of both worlds! Thank you for doing what you do and please never stop!
I’ve read everything you post for about three years. You’re my favorite blogger because of the quality of the diys you post and also because you talk about addiction like it isn’t shameful. Like its something that happened and can be moved on from.
A little over a year ago, I broke up with my boyfriend’s of seven years and it sucked so bad.I started cutting to deal with it. Probably one of the things that helped the most was decorating my own space, and I drew a lot of inspiration from your blog. I tried my hand at making a himeli light. I have a triangle statement wall. Just about everything I own is thrifted, gifted or made by me. Eventually I stopped cutting (therapy was also involved in this) and I do have bad days, but doing something creative always helps.
For what’s it worth, even if it means you have to post less I prefer the quality of the posts you do to shopping guides. Anyone can make a guide, not anyone can figure out how to make the elaborate lights you do or wield a paintbrush like you do. I still tell people about how bomb the nugget was.
So yeah, you do you. And you’re glorious.
Thank you. So many of the blogs I follow have gone the route of phoning it in and I find myself not bothering to read them. When someone writes from the heart, you feel as if you are talking directly to that person. I have missed your voice and look forward to hearing it again.
I appreciate your honesty and self reflection. It is never easy to do that. Stay strong and believe in your worth.
Mandi, I’ve been reading for a couple of years now, and I’m glad to hear that you’ve found your spark again. Our personal decorating styles are very different…although we just bought our first house, so I’m really just starting to find mine (one beige color on all walls and ceilings in the whole house…I’m not sure where or how to even start repainting!!) I love to read your blog, even though you make so many choices that I wouldn’t because it really is amazing to see the things you come up with. And I think you’re super funny. Also my husband’s grandma lives in St. George, and I always secretly wonder if we will run into you when we visit. No luck yet, but maybe someday. You do you, and I’ll be here in Lehi laughing about unicorn paint and wondering if maybe we need a copper chandelier. <3
You are hands down my favorite blogger for so many reasons, and this post is evidence of the biggest one: how real you are. And I think one of your greatest assets is the trust you have with your readers, because you haven’t sold out the way so many bloggers have. When you recommend something, I believe it’s because you actually recommend it and not because they’re paying you (though if you get paid too that’s great!)
You know what is so interesting to me is that even though your style is not my style at all, I can’t get enough of what you do because it’s just so freaking creative and inspirational. Plus you are funny and down-to-earth.
I’m always glad when I see there’s a new VR post, but I also understand that you have a life and a family and that stuff takes priority. Anyway, just waned to add a note of encouragement and thanks for being as awesome as you are.
I love your blog! You are an awesome DIYer and role model for so many good things. And fearless! There is nothing like a good challenge from our better half to remind us why we do what we do. 😉
Oh Mandi 🙂 WE LOVE YOU GIRL!!!!
You deliver such inspiration to all of us out here. I always appreciate your honesty and willing to share. I’ve been following you for a long time now and you are definitely one of my most favs (like, the blog I keep for last :)). I have learned so much from you and cannot thank you enough for answering email questions! I think that is great that someone like me who may be stuck on a design decision (the light over my bar/sink area) can reach out and you actually answer! It is always great to receive the opinion of someone who has been there a time or two. So, keep on keeping on. We will always be here waiting…
XOXO!
You always amaze me with your openness. What a heartfelt post! First, don’t be so hard on yourself. 1. Energy ebbs and flows — that’s part of the creative process. Trust your creative process. 2. Your followers will give you slack during the ebbs. We WILL just patiently wait for your next great reveal. It’s always worth it. 3. Maker is what you are and it’s what your reader’s prize in you. Honestly, I can get curation from a thousand other sources. And I zip through it quickly. Some is on, some is off for my esthetic. Most is quickly forgotten. It’s like snacking between meals. 4. Don’t compare yourself unnecessarily. Some of my favorite bloggers rarely post, but when they do I click over immediately to see what’s up with them. They all have something in common: heart. They’re real people who are in this game because they like to create, to build, to make something better. Keep being you.
Agreed with “Some of my favorite bloggers rarely post”! I stay very true to you GOOD ones – will come back and check months later. Your talent is unique, and I’m blown away by all you think of. Definitely sets you apart.
Everything you do is so inspiring and beautiful! Your creativity and story have helped me through some hard times. Thank you for what you do! Keep it coming, keep it coming! ? I’m always excited to see what you’ve come up with! And I have no idea what happened but NEVER let anyone change the way you feel about yourself! It’s obvious you are someone who is so full of joy and love and extend that to all you come into contact with! You’re amazing!
Hi Mandi!
I love your blog, you have inspired me so much. My mom always laughs at me because I will send her a picture of something I made and her response is always ” Hmm, did you get this idea from VR?” I’m so glad that you are real and raw and honest. Never stop creating!
Thank you, thank you, thank you! As a young newly-wed, interior design-obsessed, expectant mother, I found your honesty and words very encouraging. Keep it up. Keep empowering us. Hopefully that will, in turn, empower YOU. <3
I’m sad that you have felt meh. I appreciate you sharing YOU. I love that you make things and show me how with fun tutorials and videos. You are great Mandi and I appreciate your blog and I enjoy reading it each day. Ever onward!
I am so sorry for your rough year, hang in there! One thing I have learned over the past several years is that it’s okay to not have everything perfect.
I follow your blog, I have for years, for a number of reasons. One of which you named already: you make something out of nothing! I love reading my blogs but one thing I’ve noticed in others is the decrease in DIY projects. It has become a focus more on buying crap. You’re right, a lot of places say you NEED to buy that $3000 chandelier in order to transform your living room… And then I come to this blog and you say, heck no! Here’s how you make it for $10.
Well, this got a little wordy, but I wanted to tell you thanks for staying true to yourself and your vision! I cannot afford that $3000 chandelier and I am always grateful to find a place where I can make it myself ☺
You were grieving. Friendship is a relationship. Just as important as romantic ones. And when the people we love leave us it hurts. We need time to grieve. And we all do that in our own way. It sounds like you have come through your grief stronger! ( and your not a designer. Your a creator. Designers are great but creators are more)
Mandi,
I have been reading your blog for a few years and have never commented until now. Weird I know…especially since VR is the first blog I read every night when I get in bed to do my ‘blog thing’ as my husband calls it. I think you are amazing. Your story, your home, your family, your talents, your personality. You are a happy place for me so thank you for that. Some people just aren’t meant to be in our lives forever. We all experience it. But we are here now and we all love you!
You know, guilt is a funny thing. It permeates everything and makes expectations, memories, and personal worth tainted with its disapproval. It sounds like you’re saying that in the last year, you’ve been paralyzed by guilt when it comes to your blog. But here’s the funny thing – the only time I have ever felt a slump in your content is when you spend the first paragraph apologizing for your absence. Everything beyond that is still good, original, inspiring content. While there may be some readers that are desperate for more content, many of us (most of us?) are really grateful for the great projects coming from you when you have the ability to produce them. If I could have one vote for the direction of the blog (which really, let’ be honest, I shouldn’t have because it’s your blog!) it would be to unashamedly post when you want to with material you feel passionate about, without any apologies. Guilt free will bring more freedom for you and for us.
Dear Mandi, thanks for your openness, your thoughts and the direction you are taking. I love it. Years ago I spent hours in the internet, reading blogs and stuff, but somehow it was so depressing. All tose pictures of perfect homes/families/lifes. There was a lot of pressure involved. I did not feel good after reading them. Apart from abeautifulmess and your blog I stopped to read blogs regularly altogehter. It just wasnt doing me any good. But Vintage revivals has – even if a lot of stuff is not exactly my style – inspired me more than anything else (exept from elsie/emma) – and I seriously thank you for that. I did not do a lot of projects exactly like you did them, but the projects, your videos and stuff – they changed my diy-thinking and I love everything that you do. I love to read what you write, its like talking to a (very crazy but cute) friend. Thanks for doing that! With baby and everything! I really appreciate it! You are so creative!
Yes, I felt something…..a tear hanging on for dear life inside my eyeball. I’ve read your blog for a few years now. And I am one of these crazy people that went all the way to the 1st day of your blog, once I found you. You are so much fun to ‘visit’. I’ve watched you grow and learn and you have helped me grow and learn as well. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Love your own guts for a change… 🙂
To answer your question: I like tutorials. Real step-by-step stuff. I’m a very visual person.
Be Blessed….
*group hug back*
I truly believe with my whole heart that some people are born to constantly struggle internally, always competing with themselves to become better, and never accepting anything as “good enough”. These are my very favorite of all of the people. Their constant effort to improve themselves, to improve the things that they do, and to improve the world around them, constantly polishing themselves from a crusty old rock to a gleaming gemstone of humanity, often creates the most quality, truest, gleamingest kind of person, and I love that. You have not disappointed any of us. You have only improved us and the world that we live in.
Wow, Mandi. That just resonated so much with me. Really eloquently written. I think you are meant to be just exactly what you said, I really believe that you inspire and empower and teach so many women. And your attitude toward people and life might be my favorite thing about you 🙂
I’ll add to the chorus here: you are my absolute favorite blog and have provided so much inspiration! I’m very new to home decorating/diy/making anything and you constantly blow my mind with your creativity and building skills. I’ve completed a few of your tutorials and they’re my absolute favorite things in my house. It’s weird how much joy making things brings me, and your blog has a huge role in that! So thank you for spreading joy!!
Oh girl! Here’s the thing. I can’t go spend $50k on a reno and I don’t want the $3k light fixture because ANYONE can have that. I want my house to be a one of a kind that makes people stop and stare at something cool that I know they can’t get anywhere else. Most recently, you inspired me to buils my own light fixture. . .but not out of new parts. I haunted a recycle store until I found some old lamps and pieces and I built my own. I love it and it is so great in it’s space. And I’m rambling so I’ll just say thank you and send a big hug your way!!
You have always been one of the 3 blogs I follow consistantly. Your creativity + personality make for such great posts. I love your ideas. You are a genius and have a special gift of creativity that is unique to you. It can be so hard to lose yourself but can also be hugely important because of the lessons learned through the process.
Excited to read your posts. You are one in a millon.
I’m so glad you shared! I’m the mom of an only child, but my observance shows me each pregnancy redirects or redefines our paths…Happy dance you’ve found your DIwhy again!…the blogger Whippy Cake shared a great book Presence by Amy Cuddy that I’m reading…it speaks right into your situation, into all if our situations!
I can relate to this so much. Years ago, I had a friend. She was part of a group of girls that I hung around with at the time. I thought she was cool, and enjoyed her company very much. One day (shortly after she started dating a guy I wasn’t impressed with) she wrote me a letter, and in it stated that she didn’t think we had much in common anymore, and that she didn’t want to see me anymore. I tried to contact her to work it out in some way, and she wouldn’t return my calls. I was shattered in about a million pieces. I began questioning myself, wondering if there was some terrible lack in me, doubting my worthiness as a friend. It became a terrible place to be, and it took me a while to get over that kind of rejection. I finally realized, after a long amount of time and introspection, that not everyone is meant to stay in your life. Sometimes there are lessons to learn…….sometimes people come and go in your life, and not to take it personally because they are on their own path, and were never meant to stay for the long haul. I adore your blog, I love your brain, and your creativity, and the results of all that. It speaks to me! If I want to be exactly like everyone else, I could visit any other blog out there and see all the cookie cutter sameness, but I just don’t want that 🙂
this is one of the few blogs that I check every day (and sometimes more than once, in case you’ve posted in the middle of the day). I love your style and your humor. you inspire me to try and see things as what they could be – not just what they currently are. thank you for sharing – your words, your heart, and your creativity!
Oh boy….to read things you YOURSELF are feeling – the exact doubts and questions and dips in motivation….what a comfort. I can’t believe someone like you feels these things! WHICH goes to show us that even when we feel like we’re weak or lost or less than we thought we’d be, we’re so off; others are seeing us as a light out on the water! It’s so strange how when you’re alone in your head how dark and down your thoughts can turn and always surprising how hard on ourselves we can become over time. This is the plight of the sensitive, I’m afraid. To have you post this way was incredibly reassuring and motivating and awesome.
As are all of your badass creations.
As is the woman you are changing into all the time. Thank you for giving to all of us out here at our screens
Everyone has their ups and downs and I’m so happy you found your up again! I’ve been inspired by (i.e. Copied, lol) many of your projects and I’m happy to hear you’ll have more inspiration coming. I, too, had a friend leave without any known issue but she was also one that took more from the friendship than she gave so I didn’t give it another thought.
It takes guts to be so open and vulnerable in what can be a really mean place (the internet). Losing friendships is the worst but also a sign that perhaps they weren’t really friends to begin with. You have so much creativity and I personally feel really lucky to be able to read about what you’re up to and what new ideas you’ve come up with!
If I could, I would hug the stuffing out of you right now! As someone else commented, I don’t think many people speak out about broken friendships, but they should. Years ago a friend invited me out to dinner… I was pleasantly surprised until I realized it was my exit interview from our friendship. I think the two things that hurt the most were her blaming my husband for “ruining me” and telling me I wasn’t the same creative, artistic person I once was. (Which was baffling as I was working on three collages for my baby’s nursery at the time.) It hurt a lot and I still think about her (more than I care to admit), but it also brought me this weird feeling of like… But *I* know I’m not ruined and *I* know I’m still creative… Why do I need her or anyone to validate that? Because of her rejection I found peace with myself. It sounds like you have, too, and I’m so glad for that. Please don’t “sell out” your blog with sponsored garbage. I’ve been reading blogs for many years and I keep dumping all the ones that are unrelateable because of freebies, ads, promos, etc. I can’t afford to redo my whole house in marble, but I can pick up a jigsaw or paintbrush. You are SO killin’ it with your projects, makeovers, thoughts… You’re just authentic and real and such a rare gem these days. Please keep doin’ you. I love Court to pieces, but please keep telling him to suck an egg, cuz I’ll be sad if you aren’t you anymore. Love you, sister!!!
I have something to say to you girlie. You are inspiring. Not just the fantastic and wondefully creative projects you do, but you, yourself. I’ve never met you (although I’ve totally driven through St George and thought, “I wonder if I dropped by DI right now I could maybe stalk Mandy and we would become super best friends in about a minute and she could encourage me personally in my diy life and I could get SO. MUCH. DONE.!!) anyway, I look forward to your posts allthetimealways. I love your fresh and modern look at things, your infectious attitude, and your theme of Fearless DIY. I think it’s genious. Those words inspire me. We could all use a little more fearless in our lives. Keep going! The person you are is the reason I come back.
I can 100% relate to the challenges – and real trauma – of finding yourself and processing massive emotions when CLOSE friends choose to leave. I had to be the one to walk away a few years ago, because they had already made the clear choice to leave in other ways and the relationship had become abusive. I am still recovering. And trying to figure out much of who I am in the after-math. I feel you.
Also – I think it is healthy and right to take steps back when we are in these seasons to try to find ourselves and our purpose again. We can – hopefully – come back stronger and better and able to reach our dreams more completely. So I say – – GOOD FOR YOU for having the courage to step back and ask yourself who you are and what you really do/want to do! And I am super impressed with ALL that you continued to give and create during that time… WOW!
I am still struggling with my comeback, but refusing the guilt and claiming the healing and growing time. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability and rising – – and encouraging me to move forward into my own transition…
I. Feel. You.
I want so desperately to be a designer, but I feel so desperately inadequate. You are an amazing and inspiring person! Keep doing what you DO do!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
I so needed this. You were the first blog I ever followed, and you really inspired me to start my own in January this year. However I have been in a similar rut (doubting anyone would read or like it) and you have inspired me so much! It’s great to see someone I look up to, and wish I could hug in person, have real problems I can relate to. And even more powerful when they push though them! Again, thank you!
what a lovely person you are! You teach things to people everyday–way beyond the incredible DIYs. I’d say, don’t be so hard on yourself, and please don’t feel that you need to apologize to me, a grateful reader, but it seems that when you’re that hard on yourself, you have these amazing epiphanies. Just temper it all a little, and know that there are so many of us who think you’re amazing.
Hey Mandi-
First of all I’m sorry to hear of your sour year. It can be hard to push forward with creative projects and feel the drive when you are dealing with problems at home, work, in relationships etc. You also gave birth which I hear can force you to shift energy. 🙂 I have always appreciated your willingness to share what is happening in your life IRL in order to share helpful information or start conversation. Your ability to be open about DIY / design mistakes as well as change things when you aren’t satisfied is inspiring as a fellow DIYer. You have your own sense of style with your own point of view. Your DIYs are clever and unique which is a challenge this Pinterest day in age. Keep on keeping on and I think your readers will always be here. You aren’t a machine you are one person and everyone needs to take breaks now and then. Thanks for sharing your creativity with us!
Mandi, cut yourself some slack. You have a life. And your blog is not it. I’m highly suspicious of anyone who has the time and energy to post every day. And they make me tired. If “Quality Over Quantity” isn’t your middle name, it should be. What I appreciate most about you is the fact that you have things that don’t turn out. And you aren’t afraid to share them. And you think through the problem and fix it, or have the sense to abandon it, or have the confidence to look back and laugh about it later. I feel like you’ve given me permission to make mistakes; to tackle something and not feel incompetent if it doesn’t turn out. I learn from it and move on. Also, I’m a DI girl (and have been one since before you were born), so I feel like we have some sort of cosmic connection. We probably don’t, but don’t crush my hopes and dreams. Right now, duct tape and super glue are my best friends, but you’ve given me the courage to consider adding power tools to my repertoire. Here’s to meeting you in the aisles of DI someday. I’ll probably ask for your autograph–preferably on my new favorite hideous piece of artwork
I think you are a gifted,loving human being who opens her soul to us, and shares. I too had a close BFF drop me like a hot potato,and it ate me alive wondering what happen. I finally decided that she is not worth it, and it made me think how easy people will hurt others. Thank God for your blog.
Short and simple. Anyone without a creative ounce of blood, or patience or soul and walk into a store and purchase “style”….but it take a keen eye, a creative soul and unwavering sense of humor to be truly authentic….And that my dear is what makes you stand out from the blogosphere noise. Keep on keeping on with what speaks to you….because if it comes from the heart and touches your creative sole, you can be assured it will resonate with others. And remember…..there are no steadfast rules that say you have to post every XX number of days or you will perish. With more and more blog noise out there I think you are safe with challenging blogosphere convention, and posting when it is meaningful to you. People follow many blogs and can tell when it is just babble postings. Those are that sincere are the ones that capture hearts. Two meaningful posts a month are far more interesting that weekly dribble…..ok….so maybe that was not soooooo short and simple 🙂
OK, Mandi. Everything they say applies, so I won’t go into detail. But I do want to let you know that the last few paragraphs had me on the edge of my chair, right fist thrust into the air, and practically yelling “YEAH, GIRL!” Thanks for the pep rally!
Ahhh thank you! I always thought I was the only one that was dumped by a person I cared about. I relate to so many things you’ve wrote. But I have to correct you on one small thing. Yes, I found this blog because you offer your experience and knowledge, because you are kind and creative, and it helps ME. But I stayed because of YOU. I never read long blog post. I ALWAYS read yours. You are beautifully human and amazingly real. You make me feel like struggling and hurting doesn’t mean I can’t be successful and creative. In this era of picture perfect social media bloggers, you are one of the only people I actually belive. Keep up the amazing work, I find you inspiring even at times like this, for you honesty (and I totaly virtually hug you for feeling down).
Kisses from Israel
Thank you for today’s post – for the honesty and the willingness to be vulnerable. We all need to hear these things. I need to hear these things and when people I admire share them it makes it me feel stronger and braver and way less alone and way more creative. We’ve got your back! XO
Oh little sista!!! I feel for you…and I’m sure the comments above are just a sampling of the true love all your readers have for you.!! I am the Canadian YOU with a good couple of decades of DIY on you little sister -and I can tell you I STILL feel the same way ! And I am an ex-professional with WAY more skills than the average woman due to my career as a scenic artist and set designer and can ASSURE YOU I (irrationally) share your same feelings… My regrets for not documenting the decades of projects I’ve created both professionally and personally in my own hundred-year-old home, and for not even STARTing my blog and site yrs. ago …..and I don’t have little children to deal with !! YOU ARE AN AMAZING young woman. Pleeeease apologize less. We all love your site the mostest BECAUSE of your openness from the heart and for me, especially the fact that you include your fails with your DIY projects. So brilliant !! As a creator and trained artist pre-blog days, I have years of experience with people undermining or not understanding my talents on film sets -And only now that everyone and their sister is trying out DIY -do people understand what it really takes to do what we do. I constantly got grief for buying and renovating second hand finds, people constantly telling me I’m wasting my time because I am customizing something and making it, what I considered, more beautiful. Of course once they saw the final product everyone wanted it done for them (usually for free ! ) I spent way too many years giving away my talent for a flippin (i.e. )Tide commercial or other peoples homes, WAAAY undervaluing my ($) worth, and because when I started there were barely any home renos even happening, taking a lot of flack for doing things my own way!- asking a welder to do this weird thing for me, calling companies (like injection molders) to beg for a one off product/svce. To help me MAKE something you couldn’t buy and the list goes on! The stories I could tell u of people who thought I was a kook….WHO CARES!!! Do your thang! We LOVES ya for it. It probably stings more because you have an audience that all crazy artists pre-Internet days didn’t have to worry about. We only worried about audience at the final reveal and the average person doesn’t have a clue about all the hurdles along the way!! You are GENIUS for including that process and having the courage to show it ALL because you have made the ‘average’ creative person that does not have the luxury of art school etc. – feel like they too can MAKE SOMETHING BEAUTIFUL. And most importantly, you’ve revealed that it’s NOT about having money. Lady, I can’t tell u how many useless designers I’ve worked w that would not have careers if they couldn’t order stuff online. You are old school! The best designers ALL knew about how things were made and weren’t afraid to get their hands dirty. Don’t EVVA stop leading and inspiring – it’s as much your gift as your esthetic–visionary-maker self!! And Blog world needs you -to show people it IS attainable in a way that fits in to life…even if it does take 4 wkds. Instead of one! Lol
Team MANDI!!
Your design style is SO not mine but I’ve loved your blog for a long time, your writing style and your diy spirit and your openness. I love that you made a basic suburban home unique and you!! It’s inspiring!!! So thank you for keeping on keeping on. We all love it!!
Hi, Mandi.
You are so creative and sensitive. You do not owe any of us an apology.
You are a sparkle in this world. Be happy being you.
Those who left, who cares. That is their loss. Keep on shining. I love your free spirit.
Love, Debbie
I’ve followed your blog for a long time but I’ve never commented. I’m not good with words and I don’t always love everything you create but I love YOU!!! That’s why I continue to read EVERYTHING you post! You are super talented and refreshingly unpretentious! Thank you for sharing & please continue to inspire us!
First and foremost — you should know that the reason I love your blog is BECAUSE you make the things yourself. If I wanted a Crate & Barrel apartment, it’s easy to find any number of places that will show me which things to buy. But you… you spark my imagination. I rarely copy your exact projects but you’ve been the inspiration for most of the decorating decisions / diy projects / color choices I’ve made. You and this blog inspire me and I am glad that you’ve chosen to continue this path because I have a feeling that my 1br apartment will soon have to be left behind for a house and other grown-up things.
Secondly I recently had a similar experience with someone that I considered to be my best friend. I completely understand and related to your experience. It was so utterly bewildering and completely changed the way my life functioned. It is hard to find your footing when something you consider to be solid is no longer there. You are not alone and you are not weak because you grappled to get your bearings back. My friend (ex-friend?) has been out of my life for a little over a year now and I still feel a really deep sadness when something happens to remind me of her.
I wish you all the best with your recovery and I’m in awe of your courage in honesty.
Plus I’m very excited to see what projects you still haven’t even thought of yet.
You’re the real deal – try not to forget that again! Creative slumps and self doubt are par for the course when you have a handcrafted career. I am pulling for you! Also – everyone comes from different places re: friendships. I have let some relationships go when I outgrew them or circumstances made the friendship less relevant or I was unable to focus energy in that direction because things were happening with me or my kids or my marriage that consumed all of it. It’s not about the other person and it’s okay and natural! Flow like the river. Nothing stays the same forever.
This post really hit me when you mentioned link ups and Pinterest inspired posts being the new wave. When I first started reading blogs it was about true DIY. I would walk the aisles for hours at stores looking for supplies to recreate sowmthing from blogs. Blogs use to cater to the beginners and novices; now they usually just inspire us with Pinterest etc but I miss the days when I was learning how to DIY! Most bloggers have become so advanced that, as a reader, I don’t feel as inspired anymore. Idk maybe that is just me! I love your blog and I’m excited that you are feeling reignited. I have missed your posts over the last year!
I want to hug you! I have struggled in essentially the same manner, but for a different type of grief. I was led to the 12 step program by promptings. I did not have an addiction, just a sorrow that consumed me. I want to tell the whole world that the 12 steps work no matter what their problem because the Atonement covers all sin, pain, tribulation and affliction. OF EVERY KIND!! As far as DIY, I would much rather have a crappy old house that I have made beautiful because of the satisfaction of knowing that what I see around me came from my imagination and abilities (which are a gift). I am so grateful for the things that I can make and do that I have wondered why He gave me these talents. I am pretty sure the answer is similar to yours: Share your talents and make someone’s life better.
Mandi,
We have never met but I have been a fan of yours (more like stalker ) of your blog since the beginnings. I love how your style is your own and always changing and it has helped me find my own. Your blog is the only decorating/diy one I follow. If I ask my husband to help with a project he knows I got the idea from my friend Mandy. I hope I get to meet you in the flesh someday but just know there are people out there you inspire!
You have absolutely nothing to apologize for!!!! You owe us nothing, and you let us in anyway. Just keep being you-our cheerleader, motivational speaker, and Queen of freaking DIY.
I had a friend do the same thing and I feel like crap 3 years later. It hurts like I’m mourning a death. I totally get it.
I love the way your brain works. If I could I would edit out the self doubting thoughts, though. You create magic out of nothing and inspire others to get creative, too. I love your blog and, even if you did some round ups once in a while, it always delights!!!
I thought this post was inspired. The comment you made at the end about comments and likes was awesome, and very honest. Truth be told, I really love round-ups and well done sponsored posts. Here’s why: I come here to read about you, your style, your DIY projects… but the main factor is you. So if you choose an item for a round up I would read it and likely refer back to it when I’m going to make a purchase of something you highlighted. Now, I get super annoyed when people post said round ups weekly. Oh so annoyed, unless they’re relevant. But girl, you could write about just about whatever round up of products and I would trust your opinion. I totally google things I intend to purchase to read what bloggers think of them because I think bloggers are more unfiltered, honest, and able to separate themselves from the companies. Bloggers are generally not bought in my opinion, which is why I trust them way more for marketing research than I do any other source.
If that helps, at all I’m glad. But, be you!
You are awesome – please know that readers like me exist all over the world, who drop in, lurk and dream a while, wish they had your talent and are inspired by you everyday.
Mandi, I love your blog because of your honesty …don’t stop. I have a bi-polar husband who will always and forever be worth fighting for and your honesty about your struggles with Courts addictions help all of us with spouses who need extra help. It’s interesting how many people have relationships that people walk away from and I can tell you the underling reason is JEALOUSY. Jealousy is one of the most destructive emotions out there, and those type of people will never be happy for you. You will come out being a better person for them leaving your life and help you to help others going through a similar situation. Keep on going girl life is to short not to do what you like.
Hugs
E
Mandi you have been a real inspiration to me to just go for it and try to diy. I love you style and honesty! Keep on doing your thing!!!
Love your honesty. Love your vision. Love your ramblings. Above all, I love your blog. I follow many blogs, yours is one (of two) that I check every morning AND have actually recreated projects from. Stay true to who you are. You R O C K !!
Mandi,
I have been reading your blog almost since the beginning. Being creative woman…..it’s so hard to keep the train chugging along on a good day with family, life and wife commitments. We love it everything that we do. Sometimes are best escape is our friendships. Our gal pals will join in on the “crazy” when no one else will. I had a friend “divorce” me without an explanation. It was devastating to say the least. It simply…ROCKED MY WORLD! I,too, had feelings of anger, doubt and frustration. For me, if there was a good reason for the “split” then I could make since of the situation. I prayed, cried and sulked. Creativity is a muscle that needs to be daily exercised. It gets…flabby! Then we feel like we have no talent because the creative juices aren’t flowing. You’ve just had the re-boot that you need! You are one talented chica and I know you are on the right path. Moral of the story….it’s in there, I promise. Years after this friend break-up, I realize that it was exactly what I needed and my life was better for it. It took me time to figure this out and much prayer, but my self esteem strengthened and believe it or not, so did my marriage. So girl, put your tool belt on and rock that glue gun. We are all waiting to see what awesomeness is just around the corner.
I don’t know if I’ve ever commented, but I’ve followed you and your blog for years. I’m glad you’ve found your passion again! Love your guts!
LOVE YOU AND YOUR AMAZING BLOG MANDI!! seriously. Love your guts back!
I can really relate to what you are going through. I was in a business with my best friend of almost 30 years. Involved were two of her friends. Long story short, I was excluded from certain decisions that were made concerning the ordering of merchandise for our shop. Not only excluded from that but chastised for putting my painted furniture in the shop on consignment. I was told that my product was nothing more than a craft and they couldn’t make money on it. I lost my friend and was devastated. It took a while of mourning the friendship and doubting myself and my ability to create something worth while but I got through with the help of my family. There is still a hole in my heart at the loss of my friend but I have gained a new self confidence and sense of self worth. Don’t apologize! You are worthy and have created a wonderful forum that you graciously share with all of us!
Luv your guts!!! 🙂
Lin
Oh goodness, don’t be so hard on yourself! My decorating style is very different from yours, but I’ve followed your blog for years for the pure inspiration you produce. I’m so glad you’ve got your mojo back, but I doubt many of your readers have been sitting at home judging you for not putting out the same amount of content while chasing around an infant and two older kids. The difference you feel in yourself is waaaaay more intense than anything your readers have noticed. Keep your head up!
Hey, Mandi! I have followed your blog religiously for at least a year now. I’ve never commented on anything before (I don’t know why except that I tend to overthink things that I write so it takes forever and then I post it and think, “That sounds dumb.” Anywhoodles). But I just want you to know how much I LOVE, truly LOVE your blog and your style and your creativity. Your blog has helped me realize that I can do different, rad things to my home that maybe no one else will dig, but I love. And I really admire that you are brave enough to put yourself and your ideas out there. I struggle with that a LOT. I’m super worried about failing at things which means that I often just avoid doing them at all. Which is lame. Anywho, thanks for being my very favorite blog and inspiring me and letting me chillax sans kids for a few minutes every day.
Awww, such a sweet post. Thanks for sharing. I think we have all gone through losses like yours and sometimes its just part of getting older. Some peoples lives get more complicated and communication can be really hard. Keep creating, its really good therapy.
You are absolutely original, authentic and wonderful. You inspire those around you and you are REAL. You do not owe anyone an apology. Keep being you!
I think you’re brave and wonderful. There’s no doubt that betrayal is a heartache; it’s a cause for grief and mourning and introspection and endless questions that all start with “why?”. You can’t compare it to any other pain-they’re all different and the healing process moves along at its own pace. I’m so sorry you went through that. Thank you for all the inspiration. It’s helped me with my own issues.
You’re the freakin’ coolest. I love this post and I adore your blog because you do things your own way. It’s so refreshing. Thank you!
First time commenter from Aus!
Hey Lady, I’m so into each and every thing you do. I’ve been with you for about a year now but it feels longer because when I find a good DIY blog, I go back to the first post and binge read – and you totally hooked me! And to be honest, even if I find and like a “buy these to make this room” design blog, I won’t go back and read the archives, because there’s very little point – everything was out of stock long ago! Your projects are timeless and will inspire my projects for years to come. I can’t wait to see what you do next.
xo Lauren
I absolutely love your blog. I look at others and subscribe but ultimately end up Unsubscribing. I think you are real and that’s so hard to find in most people and their blogs…they all strive to be perfect but nothing in life is ever perfect. And as far as the friendship that you lost….You have to let the anger and frustration go. It isnt hurting anyone but you. Sometimes in life you have to let things go so better things can take its place. When I struggle I always remember this quote “stars can’t shine without darkness”.
Gurl. High school, senior year, 1995. My group of six friends turned on me and pretty much destroyed my faith in true friendship. it wasn’t until last year, twenty years later, that I can confidently say that I have best friends (other than my hubbie.) People can be so cruel, and it sucks that their choices have such damaging effects on us.
I’m glad you found your voice again. And if you need a bestie in Texas, I’m your girl.
I just want to get in my car (I’m now in Colorado, not on the east coast) drive west to St. George and shake you! Then give you the biggest hug ever! You must live in a very small town. You haven’t found your tribe yet. A lot of your old friends are probably jealous of your success. You don’t need “girl friend stress” when you are an adult and have a family. Forget them.
You are one of the Stars of the Internet. You have been heartbreakingly honest about your life and challenges. Not one drop of self-pity has landed on these pages. You seem to be constantly optimistic. But the best part is your creative genius. You invent things and patterns that no one else ever could. Your honeycomb wall was so great that someone (Target?) stole the idea. And then you top that idea with those wonderful wooden animals! Your tube type geometric wreaths and lighting fixtures are terrific. And then you figured out how to teach us to make them. You are one of a kind. You are barely hitting your stride. I think that you have many, many more terrific ideas inside you. You seem to have a gift for visual geometric type patterns, like the floor of the camper and the frog tape painted wall. You do not have to apologize for living your life. I can be very critical, and I don’t believe you have made any missteps At All.
When you feel bad again, email me. I have lived in New York City, worked on Wall Street, met Fortune 100 CEO’s, and know many rich successful people. You are unique, talented, and loved. You stand out in the top thirty interesting people that I know. There is more ahead for you, missy. And it is not God’s plan. He is hands off now. We have free will and he is chuckling as you discover your power. With the greatest amount of respect and affection. Love your guts!
I hear you because I have felt what you are describing. And your post has made me want to delete all the “designer” blogs I follow with million dollar dream kitchen “makeovers” and get my poop together and make something! I am new to this blog (within the last 6 months) and I did notice something. But I kept thinking, “she’s amazing. She just had a baby. I can’t wait for more.” I love this post most of all. Go you. You make me say, go me!
Hey Mandi!
Thank you so so so much for this post!!
First, yours is one of the first blogs I ever looked at and is one that I’ve kept coming back to over and over again. (I should mention that I”m in the middle of college, and though I’ve been reading on and off again for several years I haven’t yet had the chance to try some major DIY for myself.) Your set by step method is so inspiring, and I’ve loved to watch all the pieces of a room come together in a spectacular way every time. Though our tastes in decor are far from identical, you always manage to make something beautiful.
One of my favorite things about your website is your obvious love for your readers and the firm belief that anyone can do what you’ve done: transform their space into one that makes them happy! I LOVE the idea of having the knowledge and skill to save myself a lot of money, make something pretty, and feel SO accomplished when finished.
Now, as to this post in particular–thank you especially for this comment:
“You know when you want to say that you were doing the best that you could, but in reality you weren’t really doing anything to change the situation? That was me. I feel like I was living on autopilot.”
I know you didn’t mean it as criticism for anyone (or if anyone, yourself), but this really stuck out to me. This is a very familiar feeling to me. I always want to be the bestest–and there’s no reason not to strive for that–but I often feel the need to be perfect in everything. This leads me to be stretched thin over many areas and end up giving up in my heart while my head stresses and plans till I’m exhausted. (Note: this isn’t a perfect explanation of my reaction to this situation, but its the best I can do with just words:) I can’t say what this statement really means for me, but in short: it’s inspiring. To actually act takes courage, and I really look up to you not only for acting yourself, but also encouraging others to act as well–whether you know it or not.
Thank you for both being yourself, and trying to become better, and being such and eloquent writer that I was crying a bit as I read this. Keep being so wonderfully you!!
Natalie
Please, please, please, read the book Heart Made Whole by Christa Black Gifford! And check out her podcast Head to Heart Podcast. It talks about that rejection and the cycle you are describing. I love reading your blog and I think you and Christa might be kindred spirits!! Thank you for all the light you are bringing!! ❌⭕️!
I’ve tried to make this point with the people who are “designers” because they “buy things.” It didn’t work. Maybe it will help with you.
There are people out there who are miserable because they really do want to have a nice environment, and are willing to work for it, and most of what they find online tells them that an “affordable” side table is $3K. They are told not to bother making things if they don’t feel like it, because they can always just go and buy it. They are told to use the “color of the year,” mostly because that is the company which is sponsoring the given site. They frequent a website which is full of people whining about their “small, 1000 foot apartments” . . . in NYC . . . that they own.
When the price of admission to having a nicer environment is more money than they can ever find, and when the people who have the money to get that nicer environment complain about how little money they have and how they are having to “struggle”–how does that make the people who are really struggling feel? There is a surprising increase in the death rate of middle-class people (real middle-class people, not affluent-class people who aren’t as wealthy as Michael Dell)–some just stop taking their medications and die of easily-preventable diseases, and some take a more “proactive” approach. Not a small amount of this is due to the disparity they see between their own lives and the lives of people on “designer” websites.
You are different. You show people how to have a lovely, zen environment with modest amounts of money and achievable tasks. You make mistakes and show them, and we all learn. You come up with ideas that the big design pages wind up featuring, because many of the people who write on those websites have never picked up a paint brush themselves and know less about hands-on design and renovation than their readers.
Seriously–I read one article in which a woman whined for an entire article about not having a sponge to do her dishes, and not wanting one because a sponge harbors germs. The readers had to tell her to either nuke the sponge for 2 minutes or just get a dish cloth, use it once, and then wash it in bleach. Seriously–that is the level of DIY that we are talking about on those sites . . . not even being able to get dishes done.
I’m sorry that you lost some friends. That is hard–and I don’t want to minimize it. But, really, even if no one tells you often enough, you are one of the designers who doesn’t work hard causing readers to develop a bad case of affluenza (that is, “a psychological malaise supposedly affecting wealthy young people, symptoms of which include a lack of motivation, feelings of guilt, and a sense of isolation”) which they will “treat” by buying the products of the website’s sponsors. You are teaching self-reliance, and perseverance, and laughing at one’s own mistakes before trying again.
You are a real jewel, Mandi. Seriously. Have fun with the blog, because just being you really helps to improve a lot of people’s lives. You are a jewel.
“President Thomas S. monson testified: “We are sons and daughters of a living God….We cannot sincerely hold this conviction without experiencing a profound new sense of strength and power.” I have been reading the last General Conference Ensign and found a talk by Elder Donald L. Hallstrom that is super uplifting. Gut hug!
Oh Mandi, You are such a blessing to me. ? Thank you for the rawness and transparency. I’m an over sharer myself and care way too much about what others think. Thank you for sharing and making it ok. You are so brave! You’ve now given me the suspenders to pull up my britches and be the big girl I need to be. I needed this because I’ve been wanting to launch a little blog/business over the last two years and haven’t pulled the trigger, out of fear. My friends and family have more confidence in me than myself. So thanks!!! You’ve shown me I don’t have to change or contort my style/personality to fit others. I can and should be the real deal with no front. So I’ve told the negative chatter inside my head to sit down and shut up. Have a beautiful day and keep on doing what you do best. ?
Loyal Follower,
~Tammy
This was something I very much needed to hear this week.
I’m a pretty new blogger myself; we have this blank slate of a house that is just primed and ready for real action, and I love to write about it. But coming up with content regularly, especially while holding a full time nursing job, has occasionally been a pain in the rear. I hadn’t written anything in a couple weeks, and I didn’t even LIKE the last post I had written about my dining room. My husband, who I thought didn’t even really pay attention to the blog, asked me why I hadn’t written lately. I hadn’t even shared it with my mom – someone who manages several successful websites – because I was afraid of judgement and figured I probably wouldn’t stick around the blogosphere long enough to make a difference.
Your post and my husbands words made me realize it is what I want it to be. I don’t have to have daily content, or even weekly if I can’t manage it. I don’t have to have the prettiest photos and the most original ideas. I love to create, refinish, and refurbish. And I love to share what I did. And that’s all that it has to be, in the end.
This already spurred me to plan again for the upcoming weeks, and to be excited for things I’m creating. Thank you so much for your time and honest on this post, Mandi!
If we didn’t give love right back to you after your post, we really don’t know who you are and what you do for us. So much much much love and excitement over what crazy awesome thing you’ll come up with next!
I went through a similar friend breakup. I was also pregnant and the time and it was devestating. It nearly broke me. Almost three years later I still have no answers as to why. I was closed off and a bit hard on the outside after it and it has been a struggle to let others in. It has made me look at who I want to become and what really matters most. Hang in there girl I understand your pain. You are such a talented woman and I love how you empower others to create.
Mandi, I only follow two blogs and you are one of the two. The reason I have chosen you to follow is because you are a goddess. You create beautiful somethings out of nothing and inspire others to do the same and have fun laughing at mistakes along the way. -How’s that for a run on sentence?! You are REAL and I admire that.
As for an idea for the blog, how about something in reverse? Instead of showing us the room reveal and then the projects to get you there; what if you did the projects and gave tutorials along the way and THEN showed how to incorporate all those things into a space with a room reveal? -just a thought.
Your blog is fabulous and I’m glad you are fighting for what is right for you!
YES GIRL, YES! That is my immediate thought when reading this post. I totally concur with what people are saying in response to your post. Love you and your authenticity so much.
(Also, DIY > expensive stuff any day!)
You are absolutely inspiring and I totally understand where you’re at…I often felt less of a designer because I make a majority of the things to fill a room….but then I realized our Heavenly Father is a maker and how blessed I am to have been given that passion and talent. We make shit and can be proud of it?
Isn’t it ironic that we can have so many neat people supporting us and cheering us on…but it’s the few who don’t that can make such a negative impact on our lives! I’m not a DIYer per se, but tey to find other ways to be creative! How about creative kindness–as women we could sure DIY that better. One advantage of getting older (yes, there are a few) is that I better acknowledge not only my strengths, but other people’s awesome capabilities as well–life is less of a competition! Here’s to creativity in all it’s wonderful forms, but mostly to kind people who genuinely care! Have a great weekend–and take that insightful hubby of yours (aren’t we so fortunate to have wise men in our lives) out for a fun Father’s Day outing! Loving your guts. Mary Wilding http://www.mytributejournal.com
It is good to see you “back,” Mandi! I do so hope I can find my own motivation soon! I am sorry to hear of the broken friendship(s). It really, really sucks. I’m in a place where I have many acquaintances, but no friends to really do anything with, since my very best local friend pretty much dropped out of my life a few years ago. I still don’t know what happened, and can’t bring myself to ask.
That leaves me a lot of time for projects, though! (I do a lot of planning, but not a lot of executing. I seriously need help with that!) And I am trying to redo my home on less than a dime. Hopefully, I will find time to blog about my adventures once I start completing them! That was to be one of the main focuses of my blog when I bought my domain and committed financially to building an online presence.
I’ve always loved you. Ok, that sounds weird, I was going to say I’ve always lived your blog, but it’s really YOU that keeps the readers here. Honestly, I’ve never done any of your projects, but they HAVE probably inspired me to do my OWN projects, and I thank you for it. Also, your personal faith, though not what I come here for, ALWAYS uplifts me. Don’t worry about having been “off”. We get it. It happens to everyone for an infinite number of reasons. And we will be here when you are “back”.
I love this post and I love your blog. In the nicest possible way, you and I don’t share the same style, but I LOVE your style and I love to see what amazing creative things you come up with! You have such a fantastic fun personality and I love that it comes through in your writing. Keep doing what you’re doing-I so appreciate people in this world who are REAL. Thanks for being awesome!
I’m sorry it’s been a rough year for you! This is what I have always loved about you/your blog, the fact that you are real and transparent and awesome! I love what you create and that you are relatable. Hope things start lookin up for you because you bring joy to others and you deserve joy yourself. ❤️❤️❤️
“Do you know how great it is that we don’t have to be limited by what can be bought in a store or exists at face value?! ”
YES! A thousand times YES! I love that I can make exactly what I want and not be limited to what’s available in a store. Your site is a huge inspiration so please don’t doubt your very valuable contribution to the lives of others.
I have noticed that things have been a little off for a while, and I am so sorry that it had to do with loss and self-doubt. I just thought you were extra busy with getting ready for a new little one and the adjustment after his arrival. It makes me sad that it was actually coming from a place of pain. I feel the same way you do about accepting people with all their flaws and loving them anyway, but it seems that not everyone reciprocates that grace. Don’t let it keep you down. It’s their problem, not yours.
Yes! And this is why we love you! Glad to have you back 🙂
YEAH! Group hug to you too, lady! I love your style. I love that’s it’s different from everyone else’s on the internet. I love that it encourages me to try something different. I love that it can be achieved on a skimpy budget. But most of all, I LOVE these posts where you’re talking it out and keeping it real so I don’t feel so inadequate that my house is not worthy of Apartment Therapy. Thanks for making me feel like we’re in this together today.
Hey girl, I’m just gonna add to the chorus here – don’t be so hard on yourself. You are great and wonderful – learn that and don’t forget it. And I advise you not to put your happiness behind everyone else’s – only do this blog if it makes you happy – not because you owe any of us. I love your stuff and you and wish you all the best!
The reason I read your blog is that you are true and real. In your projects and in your feeling, and this takes guts. I like guts. When I read your posts I find connection, which I don’t find just everywhere, it’s rare. Reading your pages is not an acquaintance, is a friendship. You created much more and much better because of your independent and hands on approach, not only to diy, but to life. Be proud of it!
Welcome back =) *big hug*
Don’t ever, never, ever apologize. I always read you because of your personality, your good heart, your realness. I would hate to see this blog lose the unique style that is Mandi.
Thanks all the way from Australia for your wonderful energy, for the inspiration you provide; both to make the world a tiny bit more beautiful and to be revived by the catharsis of creating.
This corner of the www is very special, looking forward to its future.
X
Girl…we all love you because you are the real deal. Not only do you inspire us to just ” do it ” ourselves and succeed, you give us the nuts and bolts, deep down dirty, nitty-gritty details of what’s going on in your world, which in turn-helps us with ours! Nothing in this life flawless. Nothing is perfect. Everyone has those times when they’re just going with the flow, bobbing along…searching for themselves…whatever you want to call it… you are not alone there x a million. Reading your blog is like talking to your best friend. I have nodded in agreement, laugh/snorted outloud and referred to screen shots in Lowes on numerous occasions! We are in this together. Those of us who’ve followed you for a while know mourning the loss of a friendship would be hard to mask when you are known for being an over-sharer ( just one of the billion reason we love and adore you). Keep keepin’ it real Mandi, I appreciate your candid oversharing, humorous super detailed description of life and processes. I am a creative right brainer so I love the step by step tutorials and explanations on the left brainy detailed stuff too! I know I said nothing in this life is perfect but, I’d say this blog and the woman behind everything it entails comes pretty durn close!! Love your guts!! From Kentucky
Mandi – thank you for sharing your heart. I’ve been following your blog for a couple years… I found it one night when I couldn’t sleep and have been a fan ever since.
I love the challenge of creating something and there is something so satisfying about making something with our own hands. In fact, I just saw this article this morning and thought you’d enjoy it – https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/study-says-making-art-reduces-stress_us_576183ece4b09c926cfdccac.
Being a creative and a “feeling” person can make me feel pretty vulnerable sometimes. And the loss of a relationship is always a difficult situation. (I’m struggling with some family relationships related to addiction and it’s put a gray cloud over my emotions for a while now.)
Thank you again for sharing… and for giving fellow creatives the encouragement that we CAN make things we love. Sending love your way!!
Mandy, thank you for sharing, and for your candidness. I am a relatively new reader, but I want you to know that you and your blog matter to me! You have shown me and taught me much about making something beautiful with limited means. As a medical student and army wife with a limited budget, I’ve been able to make my home feel so special with your tips and tricks. Thank you. I have been through similar moments of doubt about myself, and I can honestly say, it gets better. I know you’ll find a way to feel connected again.
As a longtime reader, you have great energy that makes your blog a joy to read. You aren’t afraid of posting interesting content and reveling in who you are as a person, so you keep that up. Make stuff and be your wonderful self, the rest will come along. From Arkansas…
Mandi, Thank you for sharing your inner struggle with this. It’s inspiring. You see, you’re one of the people I envy. I think, “How is it she can get so much home renovation done and I have done so little around here?” You’re amazing, and you have created such a successful blog that people want you to speak at conferences and big name companies want you to represent their products! But maybe if you can feel down like I do, then I can achieve things like you do. Don’t feel bad about the frequency of your posts. Just keep sharing the things you love.
If you want to add in some more posts, make it progress posts, of teaser posts, or something or something that inspires you.
P.S. I’ve lost close friends, I’ve been ghosted by close friends, and I’ve cut off close friends who were poisoning my life. All you can do is be the best friend you can be, be confident that you’ve done your part, you’ve reached out to them, and not let it ruin the rest of your life. Sometimes it’s not that they don’t want to remain friends, it’s just the overwhelming things going on in their life that prevent them from responding to you as they might like. In that case, don’t let yourself get down about it. You would be surprised at how enduring some friendships can be even with periods of no contact. As long as you still want to reach out and be their friend, don’t be afraid to do so.
Oh Mandi! I have never commented, but your story struck a chord with me. The”leaving” is soooo tough on the “leavee”. We do internalize and it is a serious process to get through it with no closure to be had. I feel ya Sister!! It hurts. I so admire that you kept posting through it all, in any way you could. What else can we do but move on and live our lives the best way we can? You are a rock star and don’t you forget it!! DIY 4 Life!!
I read your blog precisely because it’s not affiliate links and buy, buy, buy. I come here because I’d much rather DIY than buy and your tutorials inspire me to continue being creative and innovative. Keep it up!
How beautifully said. You and your work are one-of-a-kind, inspirational, and irreplaceable. You make me feel the possibilities around me. Thanks!
I think we’ve all had that kind of experience with friends, and felt lesser than because of it. I’m so sorry that it happened to you.
The thing that I do know about blogging is that you have an audience who is cheering you on, all of the time. Even on days you might be feeling a little off, we’re so excited that you have made something – or written about something because for many of us, it’s more than we can do at that time. We live vicariously through what you are up to. Watching so many of my favorite bloggers put so much pressure on themselves and eventually quit stinks, because as the audience, we’re grateful for all of it. (And there’s douchebags out there who aren’t, but why would you care about their opinion?) You be you, Mandi. You’re funny, and lovely, and real, and imperfect, and your blog will be that way too. And people read it because it’s real, not because it’s perfect. Also, because you make cool stuff. 🙂
Oh Mandy, I completely feel you on the friendship thing. My best friend (or so I thought) of 17+ years and I “broke up” on my wedding day. She did some crazy shady stuff that left 90% of my guests like :O and couldn’t see anything wrong with it. It was heartbreaking. What was supposed to be one of the happiest times in my life left me super depressed. I felt like the day I got married to my husband was the same day I got divorced from her. All I can say is that time heals. That was 6 years ago and the hurt still creeps up every so often.
And as for the blog material, I’d SO much rather wait for one of your creative/original/thoughtful posts than to read fluff and filler posts.
-Reader4Life 😉
Liz
Your DIY inspires me! What I love about you is you are figuring everything out and sharing the journey. I think I get more out of the mistakes than I do the successes. Every time you create something, thrift something, paint something, and then decide you want a change and do it all over again you breath courage into me to stop being afraid and “just kick the ball”. I’ve never felt so creative and empowered as when I read your blog. Thank you for doing what you do.
Girl, this spoke to me in so many ways. Ever since getting pregnant I’ve felt this total halt of creativity and drive. I am unmotivated, self-conscious, and just kind of blah. I’m trying to show myself some grace and just enjoy this time but part of me has been worried I’ll never get it back!
I hope that you know you need not apologize at all. I look at reading your blog like a total treat to get to step inside your world and I don’t expect specifics out of you. I come for the great projects and all, but mainly I come for you. Honest, down-to-earth, you. Thanks for making me feel a bit better about what’s been going on in my head, and I’m excited for all that I know God has in store for you!
Group hug, Mandi, group hug! You are so so so not alone. Thank you for being brave and sharing.
SO feeling this post. Thank you for putting this out there and explaining the need for DIY amongst us hands-on folks.
Love you girl! Do you 🙂
thank you ! have been thinking of leaving this site in the past year- but keep coming back because your earlier stuff ( the blog writing and not really the stuff) was really inspiring. It is incredible to do things yourself- to pick up those power tools- to see the finished project!! Thank you for inspiring me and also for this introspection!
Looking forward to the future!! and ya friendship break-ups suck!!!!!
WOMAN!!! SILLY QUESTION: Do we know how awesome it is to dream something up for our home and then make it with our own 2 hands?!?! THAT is why we come HERE!! Because YOU teach and show us that better than anyone else! We (or I) could easily go to those other blogs that round up pretty things we can buy for a gazillion $$, or even less expensive versions, but that is not where our hearts lie. When i first found your blog i was absolutely blown away by your DIY projects, because they are miles ahead of what anyone else is doing…. and VR immediately became my favorite site, and I visit A LOT of sites!! Again, there ARE other crafty blogs, but they are not DESIGNING on-trend meaningful items/rooms for our homes like you. YOU bridge that gap between buying and crafting with honest to goodness real DIY rooms/furniture/accessories that people actually want to own. And to be taught how to make these designs come true with our own 2 hands is AMAZING.
To be honest, I had noticed the recent decline in your posts and projects, but I just figured it was pregnancy/new mom related. DO NOT let doubt take the wheel, woman! We NEED YOU, and YOUR ‘brand’ just the way it is! So kick those voices to the curb, and get back on your horse, like the outstanding cowgirl that you are!
If you need a replacement friend, I can be it? Seriously though, a friendship break up is just as traumatic as a realtionship break up, and I have been there when I had to let all my partying friends go. It sucks, but it sounds like you are working through it well… anytime you’re feeling low, go squish on that baby for a while, but for the love of God, please don’t take away my VR!!! Ok?
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I don’t care what the next big thing is. I’m not in ‘blog land.” I just love reading your blog. I like seeing your remodels, I’m interested in the thing you are into at the moment, and I think you have to know that because you have stayed true to yourself, there isn’t another Vintage Revivals ‘look’ out there. Just you. Doing your thing. Nowadays, that is extremely rare. I like it. I’ll read as long as you write. And even if I never attempt another DIY, I’ll read about yours because I enjoy it. You are a source of enjoyment in my life.
I love your blog because you DON’T do the boring round-ups and uninspired crap that a lot of other blogs do. I love when you post about your goof-ups, and less than perfect creations. It has really inspired me to do different projects around the house and get familiar with power tools. I sometimes wish that you could post more “in progress” projects, especially for the stuff that takes a long time. Like, “We’re repainting this room and all we’ve done so far is put up blue tape, but life got in the way, so here’s the colors we might use.” Your blog is a great reminder that we are human and the whole design this is a process. The “reveal” is only ONE of the benefits.
I’ve been reading you for a couple of years now. While I mostly read for the eye-candy, what has helped me a lot is reading about your co-dependency. And now, this post is very timely for me… You have no idea how much good it did me. I really needed to read this. Thank you so much, and God bless you and your family.
Just found your blog and I’m going to keep reading. Diy is my thing that I love to do. I love learning, I love new tools, and I love that I feel like I’m good at something. Thanks for sharing. I’ll be flipping through to see if I can start something from your blog!
Absolute group hug from me. When I first found you about 18 months ago I was in a bad headspace too. You were my muse and gave me so much inspiration exactly when I needed it. It seriously helped me through a bad break up with a business partner who I thought was a friend. And while I have missed your work a tiny bit lately, I wasn’t mad at all. You made a human. !!! That is the most amazing creation ever above all else. So even if you were a little slow on projects and posts we all totally understood. And for you to admit you were struggling with some personal things too just makes us love you more for being human. No one is perfect. Life is messy. You make it prettier and more fun too look at. We will be here when you get your mojo back. In the meantime, cut yourself lots of slack.
Love YOUR guts,
A huge fan!
It takes a lot of courage to open up and share your thoughts like this. I think we tend to think that everyone else has everything figured out. I guess maybe Fearless doesn’t mean we don’t have fears. It means that even though we have things we’re afraid of, we push through them. With the help and support of people who believe in us.
Thanks for sharing. <3
Apology accepted……but was not NEEDED. love you (met you at pinners with the nugget). So you asked if anyone had ideas for you??? Dont know if you would have the time (2 cute girlies and newish baby boy). Could you possibly draw plans for someone’s room if they send in pictures??? I struggle with seeing things and would love and pay for your expertise.
P.S. every time I go to di I think of you…also I might check the st george di when I am down there secretly. (Hopefully not creepy)
P.S.S. As a long time reader (I made a tinfoil cedar chest) I love how open and honest you are.
Mandi,
I adore you and your blog! You such a beautiful mess! Probably the most honest the internet has ever been. You show your guts. In a world trying to keep up with the Jones’ you are on a whole other planet. I cannot wait to see all the amazing things God has in store for you. What a wonderful gift you have to be so open, loving, and totally original which is so rare. You are blessed, and a blessing! Love your guts Mandi!-Kira
*hugs* it’s ok, Mandi. Ever since I met you in person when you came to Mesa, AZ and had an impromptu get together at the park with some followers, I’ve been a devoted fan. Nothing could change that. Stay yourself!